Do you ever go through stages in your relationship where your partner seems to just blend in with the furniture? You get so busy and side-tracked with making the dinner, putting petrol in the car, picking wet towels up off the floor, feeding the dog, etc, that you forget to actually see them. They become just another part of the routine and the landscape. Even worse, I find that when I am in a rut like this, I really only notice my husband when he has done something that irritates me, like forgetting to put the bins out. Not exactly the recipe for romance!
When I realise that I am doing this, I make a concious decision to really take the time to notice my husband. Yes, it sounds a bit strange, but I promise it works. It’s like looking at them with the fresh eyes that found them so attractive in the first place. You know that feeling you get when you come home from holidays and you see your house in a whole new light? You lok around and think “I forgot how spacious it is here, and how pretty this paint colour is”. Well this is a bit like that, without the going away part.
Sometimes I look at my husband and try to imagine what other people see when they look at him. Do they like his warm brown eyes? The way he seems so friendly and confident?
Other times I wonder what I would think of him if I met him now for the first time. When we first met and fell in love, I spent a great deal of time noticing all the appealing details of him. Yet these details can get a little blurry as the years pass.
Taking the time to notice and appreciate my husband helps to remind me of the wonderful man that he is, and of how lucky I am to have him.